A drunk pre-wedding-y drabble. Indulge me, okay.
together at last, t?, warnings: none? Pre-wedding night and these two dodos can’t bear to be apart.
They said it, they both agreed to it. No seeing each other before the wedding, it’s bad luck. And yet, Aaron is on his phone, texting Robert at eleven just because he doesn’t know what else to do.
He doesn’t know if it’s sad or romantic that his soon-to-be husband again is the person he does everything with, and that being without him for one night is twenty times harder than he imagined.
We should be together, Robert texts him.
Aaron sighs. They’ve not spent a night apart since they got back together, so the thought of actually being without Robert opens up a pit in his stomach and a hole in his chest.
We’re not supposed to.
C’mon.
Robert.
I love you.
Aaron doesn’t know what to say to deny that. The chasm inside him expands and he feels unstable. Not unready or unprepared for their wedding, but the lack of Robert in his life, even for a night, destabilises him and he can’t know which way is up until he sees Robert’s face.
Sneak up.
Like the old days?
It’s soft, and it makes Aaron smile. He’s lying on what used to be his bed, feeling a sense of nostalgia for how things were. Not the struggles, but the simpler parts. The spaces in between where they fell in love.
He lets Robert in in the cover of darkness. He checks whether the coast is clear and waves him up and presses a finger to his lips to shush him. So much has changed and Aaron can see it in the lines of Robert’s face. He’s older now, crows feet creeping in around his eyes because he laughs more. He isn’t that same scared man rebelling against his own heart. He owns it and gives it to Aaron without reservation.
They laugh at the similarity of it, lips barely touching through their grins. Married. It’s what they’ll be. It doesn’t change anything for Aaron. He’s always been Robert‘s. Stolen with a kiss and a touch of fear. Maybe if Robert had lied that day in the layby, pretended to be smoother than he was, Aaron would have forgotten him, but he didn’t. He let his fear shine through, let it take him away from Aaron, but then pushed it back enough to come for him in the garage. He wrote honest desire on Aaron’s heart and nothing has ever come close since.
It’s that craving that’s brought them here now, clothes peeled off, and hands lovingly pressed against hot flesh.
Every kiss is I need you. Every touch, I desire you. Every look, I love you. Aaron lives in those moments, where time stops, and it’s four years ago, three years ago, two, and yesterday. Nothing ever changes for them. His body throbs for the way only Robert knows how to touch him, tucking himself inside Aaron; mind, body and soul, rewriting him into the song of two people. It’s all he’ll ever be now, and he craves it. To exist only in this comfort of them. His sighs aren’t ignored, Robert is attentive to him, giving him more kisses, more sloping fingers as he grips and clutches at what he needs.
Pleasure mounts and peaks, but Aaron feels the most for the moments after, when Robert shakes and lies on his chest, safe and cocooned in his arms. Today, Aaron is himself for one last day, but it’s an illusion. He’s Robert’s. He always has been, and finally, he gets to be in every way that he can be afforded. His husband. Never to be torn asunder.
He kisses Robert’s forehead and lets him doze. He can leave in a bit, when night gives way to day, and when tradition demands absence. It’s not, and it never will be who they are. Aaron is Robert’s, and today is just the day he gets to show the world that.
Amanda Janes Tumblr Backup 