corporationsarepeople:

dinosaurrainbowstarfish:

beachfox:

livebloggingmydescentintomadness:

ffermented-salmonella:

goddessolga:

since1938:

My man Jesus

What story is that?

Matthew 18:9

“And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away.”

“Jesus, how can I avoid sin when all these hussies keep revealing the fact that they have bodies?!”

“Hmmm, tough call bro. Have you tried gouging out your eyes so you don’t have to see all those bodies anymore?”

“wut”

“What?”

“Shouldn’t you tell them to… stop dressing like that or something?”

“Don’t see why. It’s not their fault that the fact that they have bodies makes you a fucking sinful horndog. Gotta fix that problem yourself, buddy. Go on, blind yourself.”

“Uh….”

“Or learn to keep it in your g’damn pants no matter what they’re wearing.”

He goes on for like several examples too.

“How can I avoid like, an accidental slip of the hand when…they’re dressin like that?”

“Cut it off.”

“wut”

“Cut it off. Your hand. If it’s a problem, stop having a hand.”

“wut”

“What”

“Did I fucking stutter?”

vicbartons:

i sure had my problems with iain, but this whole “time to rebuild emmerdale” attitude is such a joke considering that just going off of viewing figures and especially award recognition the show objectively improved throughout his reign compared to the kate oates days. also i´ve said it before and i´ll say it again, there´d be no robron today, if she´d continued. 

Hey gorgeous 💕 I hope many good things happen to you today. I hope someone smiles at you when you step outside and that a cup of your favourite drink is made just right. I hope you hear your favourite song on the radio and you talk to your favourite person. I hope all the queues are gonna be short and you don’t have to worry about rushing anywhere. Mostly I hope you feel just a little bit lighter and happier than you did yesterday and that you get to smile as much as possible 🌺🌻🌸

Thank you!!! ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ I want to reverse that great sweet sentiment right back at you! Have a good one anon! 🙂