*me, if confronted by a horror movie slasher villain* “But why are you bothering with me? I have deliberately made a point of staying away from basements, attics, Ouija boards, school janitors, going into the woods, banging on Halloween, Make-Out Point and old abandoned summer camps!”

mysharona1987:

*Him* “But you did not avoid showers.”

*Me, remorsefully, as I look at my soap* “Ah, my one mistake.” 

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